Tuesday, February 17, 2009

THREE INDICATIONS THAT YOUR HEADED FOR A BREAK UP






Sign one)One of the most common reasons relationships fail is because one or both partners is tuning out. It might sound minor, but in actuality, few things are more hurtful than being ignored by your loved one, whether that is accompanied by emotional neglect or physical distance.

The remedy)Tuning back in is easy. All you have to do is agree to listen to your partner's feedback and dedicate time and emotion to the relationship again. Start taking down the emotional wall, brick by brick. Look at your partner in the eye when he or she speaks (even if it is not what you want to hear), make physical contact daily (even if it is just holding hands), and re-commit to the relationship.

Sign two)Couples who fight fire with fire can expect a relationship that is constantly up in flames. Name-calling, sarcasm, criticism, and violence (from throwing things, slamming doors, to actual physical abuse) result in emotional wounds that are hard to heal and relationships that are hard to rescue.

The remedy)The next time you feel anger guiding you to say, or do, things you might regret, take time to cool off. If that's not possible, try framing your complaints as requests. For instance instead of, "Why did you forget our date?," you could say, "I feel sad that you forgot our date. How can we make sure this doesn't happen again?" If your partner is the one who is fanning the flames, don't engage in the vicious cycle of insults and tantrums. You can't fight fire with fire if the other person won't engage in the flame-throwing.


Sign three)No one is perfect, so why is it that some of us refuse to take responsibility in our most important relationships? Passing the buck and playing the victim are surefire ways to put a relationship in jeopardy.


The remedy)The next time you forget an anniversary, or say something hurtful to your spouse, don't try to pass the buck and refuse to take responsibility. Instead, admit where you went wrong and try harder next time. Sounds simple... but it can save your relationship.

By making simple changes to the way you and your partner communicate, you can keep your relationship intact. All couples fight and argue, but it is how you fight and argue that determines whether your love can weather the storm.

QUOTES ON BREAK UPS AND LONELINESS

“They say when you are missing someone that they are probably feeling the same, but I don’t think it’s possible for you to miss me as much as I’m missing you right now” ~ Unknown

“Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated.” ~Lamartine

“It only takes a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone & a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone” ~ Martin Scorcese

“When I see your smile, and I know it’s not for me, that’s when I’ll miss you” ~ William Defoe

“Can miles truly separate you from friends…. If you want to be with someone you love, aren’t you already there?” ~Richard Bach

“The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected.” ~Nicholas Sparks

“Absence from whom we love is worse than death, and frustrates hope severer than despair.” ~ William Cowper

“If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden.” ~Claudia Ghandi

“What is the opposite of two? A lonely me, a lonely you.” ~Richard Wilbur

2 comments:

  1. Very good and insighful advice! And it is so true. These tips can even be used for dealing with loved ones/ friends on a daily basis.

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